The Darroch Legacy

A Sims 3 Legacy blog

Chapter 2.3 – Fleshy frogs and mighty stags


Welcome back to the Darroch legacy! Your emotions better be capable of wearing seat belts  because they are about to be taken on a wild ride!
Actually, that is a lie. In fact it’s a lot more like a bumpy and awkward ride in a dirty pickup truck with a sweaty and desperate stranger. A pickup truck with no seat belts and no escape. Only forever-sleep. Shhh, now.
Ahem, I’ll give you all a quick recap. As you may recall, Lily returned home from Uni and married her Imaginary Friend, Patterns. Laura ruined the wedding by turning up wearing nothing but a patriotic bikini. The groom forgot to wear a suit. Tears were shed, vomit was projected, etc. Archer became an adult. Oh, and Lily is pregnant!
Some of you might remember the lady in this picture. Holly has been dating Archer for a while now, which I’m going to take as a sign that he’s finished sowing his wild oats and is ready to settle down. However…

…the family really don’t like her. Connor in particular seems to take extreme offense to the fact that Holly even dares to exist. Lily isn’t much of a fan either, and tends to heckle her constantly which is rather out of character. Laura has been totally indifferent but she is like that with everything that isn’t edible so it probably doesn’t mean anything.

However it doesn’t stop Archer from getting frisky with the hated Holly. In his older sister’s bed no less. Yeesh, what a class act. That’s totally going to improve relations with the future in-laws.
Oh well, DMHWH (doesn’t matter, had Woo-hoo).

Well, that must have been an incredibly good session of the ol’ in and out because as soon as those few sim-seconds of apparent bliss were over Archer got down on one knee and popped the question.
He even managed to do it without looking like a total creeper, which is more than I can say for his mother and sister. Those facial expressions still haunt the deepest reaches of my nightmares.

It’s official! I also think I heard a lullaby…
The two of them made the wise decision to move out post-haste before Lily could figure out the horrific reason behind her mysteriously damp bed sheets.

“What’s this? You’re hiding some rare cucumbers in here, right? That’s why you look so lumpy!”
“Uh, no dad. I’m pregnant!”
“Huh? What? No rare cucumbers? Then who cares. This is the most disappointing day of my life.”
Connor was later heard sobbing bitterly in his room whilst listening to 80’s rock ballads and using his favourite gourd to absorb his tears.

Luckily for Lily, Patterns was a lot more receptive to the good news.
“You mean when my arm went through your stomach and your leg went through my skull, it created a baby?”
Ah, the wondrous horror of Woo-hoo.

Surprisingly Laura seemed to be the most excited about the news, which is incredibly out of character for her (despite her family orientated trait) considering she spent most of motherhood either ignoring her children or forgetting exactly who they were. I’m pretty sure when they were babies she  thought they were some new form of oddly fleshy burrito.

“Maybe your baby is in this egg?”
Oh, look at that. Laura has finally ‘cracked’. Geddit, geddit, geddit?
* chorus of knee slaps *

D’aww. I’m so glad Lily eventually found love with Patterns. Though I do find it odd that he literally knew her when she was still in diapers. I keep expecting Chris Hansen to pop out of nowhere with a chair and a plate of brownies.

This is the third time Laura has attempted to paint her daughter. For some reason the previous two were super blurry and made Lily look like she was either ill, a zombie or on fire.
I’m starting to think that Laura has become sentient and is trying to mess with me. I swear I can smell Doritos whenever I’m drifting off to sleep.
She is watching me. Heeeeelp.

UGH. Why is that toad the most grossly detailed and textured thing in the entire game?! Whenever I look at this picture for too long I swear I can actually feel like it is on me or something. It would definitely be slimy, and the skin would be like thin tissue so if you touched it you’d be able to feel all the insides. * dry heave *
Why am I doing this to myself. I need sleep.

As soon as Archer moved out, the old room he shared with Lily became a mini-aquarium. Oh, and Lily completed her LTW of owning 13 different kinds of perfect fish! 
Just in time too, because not long after this four of them died of starvation. Whoops!

Did you know that when you feel the early signs of labour coming on, you should immediately change into your graduation robes in order to ensure a healthy and safe delivery?
No, neither did I. This game has taught me so much.

I should also mention that this room was previously the aquarium, which was previously Archer and Lily’s shared bedroom. Now it’s a spare bathroom and laundry room!
I should probably be less excited about that and more excited about the fact that Lily just popped a baby out of her lady garden.
Meet Noelle! She was born with the brave and light sleeper traits. I can’t stand the second trait, it’s so boring. Right up there with hydrophobic. Her favourite food is stu surprise, she enjoys french music and loves the colour green.

“Oh good, I see you finished giving birth all of five minutes ago. I’m sure you’re in prime condition for a ferocious ravishing!”
* cue lullaby *

“O mighty stag, I offer you a gift born of my own body!”
Lily has become delirious ever since completing her LTW. I think those horrifically fleshy frogs were the only thing keeping her sanity in check, despite having entirely the opposite effect on me.
I feel like I may have subconsciously been thinking of the Great Northern hotel from Twin Peaks when I made this bedroom for her.

Luckily, Patterns was around to pluck Noelle from her stag obsessed mother. Lily was ordered to head outside and fish up some more frogs until she could think clearly again and dry heaving commenced all around.

The tradition continues! She may not look pregnant yet, but I’m quite certain I didn’t imagine that lullaby.
I just noticed that the family picture seems to have vanished from its frame! How odd. Maybe Laura ate it.

Lily pauses during her chores in order to spend a moment staring through time and space. She inherited that habit from Connor.

Noelle’s birthday eventually rolled around so both Archer and Holly were invited to celebrate with the rest of the family.
Instead of greeting each other upon arrival, the three of them just stood there staring at each other for an uncomfortably long time.

Connor has this awful habit of looking terrifying whenever someone is celebrating their birthday. May I remind you of the incident of the unknown child celebrating his birthday in the park? I’m still trying to wipe it from my memory.
Laura is suitably frightening, too. Her mouth decided to double in size for no reason. Or maybe there is a reason? Perhaps she wants to eat Noelle whilst she is still in burrito form!

As you can see, Noelle managed to escape the gaping maw of her grandmother before it unhinged and devoured her whole in snake-like fashion.
I’m a little sad that she didn’t inherit her father’s fabulous hair colour but she still looks cute! Seems like she’s inherited a blend of her mother and grandmothers hair colour, perhaps?

It appears Laura does in fact posses some kind of maternal instinct. It just didn’t rear its head until now.
Lily is really inhaling that birthday cake at quite an alarming rate.

I usually find the toddler stage incredibly dull and monotonous, but I think that might have something to do with my play style. I have a tendency to obsessively micromanage my sims despite having them on free will. I’m now trying to quit that habit and just let them do their own thing. Turns out toddlers are a lot more interesting when you just ignore them and let them wander around the house. However I really wouldn’t recommend applying that philosophy to real life.

Connor was always a fairly decent parent, at least when his children were young. I think he just disturbed them horribly once they reached their teenage years and uncovered his bizarre vegetable fetish. I’m hoping that wont be the case with Noelle.

I could be wrong, but I don’t remember Laura ever being interested in teaching her own children to talk. However, she is constantly rolling wishes that involve Noelle in some way. But despite my initial suspicions, she has yet to attempt placing her in the oven.

The family had a decent amount of simoleons to spare so I decided to prepare a bedroom for Noelle in anticipation of her becoming a child. I really like it!
I think I got the wallpaper here, if anyone is interested:
In fact I get a lot of my CC from there. I like clutter.

Another view of the bedroom.

Aaaand another. Everyone needs a reading nook!

There was also enough money left over to remodel and redecorate the bathroom. The previous incarnation was far too small and was causing all sorts of problems, including the floor glitching out.

The most important part of any bathroom. Unless of course you enjoy defecating on the floor. I wont judge.

Things were starting to get a little hectic, so a second floor was added. I sold everything in Connor and Laura’s old room and used the cash to build them a larger bedroom upstairs.

It is the type of room that definitely looks as if it belongs to grandparents. All it’s missing is a bowl of horribly chewy toffee.
…I forgot to take a picture of the bed. Sorry! I’ll include one in the next update.

It may look pleasant on the inside, but the outside of the house is still a total clusterfuck. I tend not to think about window placement very hard when I’m decorating. I should probably rethink that.
So, I’ll wrap it up here for now. Next time…more babies!

In other news Lily, Archer and Patterns are now available for download! Yay! Exciting!

Also, my husband and I recently adopted a 9 year old, one eyed black cat named Woody. He is adorable. I originally only went to the cat shelter because my mum wanted to adopt a cat and asked me to come along with her. Whilst I was there I saw Woody and immediately wanted to give him a home. Apparently he had been in the shelter for a long time because nobody wanted him. 😥

He’s lovely.  He spent most of yesterday and today repeatedly exploring every inch of the flat. He’s also super affectionate. He stands on his hind legs whenever I reach out to pet him and loves cuddling up with us on the sofa. ❤ Looook at hiiiiiiiim

Author: janeeyreforce

24 thoughts on “Chapter 2.3 – Fleshy frogs and mighty stags

  1. Awww!! Noelleis adorable!!! I have that same hair for my sims too!!

  2. DMHWH (doesn’t matter, had Woo-hoo)

    Seems to me that should be trademarked

  3. Wow, you’re completely right about that toad! I actually really love reptiles and amphibians, but that toad is disgusting. I’m a bit ill today, and that image didn’t help my upset stomach AT ALL.

    I honestly spent all of the last update trying to figure out why the new bedroom seemed SO familiar, and I think you’ve hit the nail on the head. Thad definitely is very reminiscent of the Great Northern hotel! Unfortunately, like pretty much everyone else, I stopped watching that show as soon as they revealed the killer. I feel like it could’ve been even more amazing, if Lynch had been able to take his time.

    At any rate, I am in love with Noelle! I can’t wait to find out if the new baby has Patterns’s hair!

    • Yeah, it’s pretty vile. I remember pausing and calling my husband over to look when I first saw it, and his reaction was much the same as mine! I do hope you feel better soon!

      Oh man, it really went downhill after they revealed the killer. I have no idea why I bothered to keep watching it after that point, especially considering I knew it got cancelled and that the ending would leave me hanging. Still bothers me! I agree with you that it could have been so amazing if Lynch was able to continue with it. So much potential!

      Fingers crossed for rad hair!

  4. Lovely chapter janee… there are many things I wanted to ask you while reading this chapter:
    1. where do you get CC for decorative items, and wall patterns? Or is that from one of the expansion packs? I don’t have supernatural.
    2. Oh shoot! That number one question sums up about the “many” things I wanted to ask as all of them are CC related LOL. Sorry.

    So yeah, any particular places you get your stuff? I love the way you decorated the kids room. Lovely. The house has a a certain charm I can’t say exactly what, but I imagine myself living there and waking up every morning at 6 to work on sunflower fields while I leave my hubby to take care of dippers and drools; I get to be the one who enjoys the bed time story! Of course that is only my fantasy.

    • Nearly all of the decor comes from this site:
      I am on that particular site almost constantly. There are also some really lovely houses on there, though I have yet to try any of them in game. The stuff for the kids room was all from that site! 😀 Have a good hunt around on there, pretty much everything he or she makes is gorgeous.

      Thank yoooou~!

      • I love that blog. Her houses are beautiful!!! I have them all downloaded but have not played with any yet because I’m afraid my game won’t handle so many CC, I don’t know… I get paranoid with so many crashes hahaha. But Ill go check out the downloads of individual stuff, didn’t know she had them listed. Thanks!! 😀

      • wait!! I didn’t see anything on her site, just the downloads for the houses. :/

      • Sorry, that was my mistake. I think a lot of it comes with the houses which is how I got the stuff. Sorry! D:

      • Don’t worry, I figured it out. I thought I had missed something when I read you before about the downloads. I often go to her blog and look at her beautiful houses and struggle with myself to whether get the houses in the game or not. Because it is a pain to always have to depend on downloading the lot in order to get the CC. But no other choice I guess… so I have been downloading all her houses since last night hehehe 😉

      • I actually tried out one of her houses in-game for the first time about an hour ago. It was the little trailer. Totally gorgeous, I really wish I had the ingenuity to build that kind of thing. All the clutter that comes with it is lovely, too.<3

      • wow okay, I think I will playing her newest house at one point in my story. Ill make it so that I can play it as is, I love the idea of a house and coffee shop. It looks amazing, as all of her stuff.

      • Finished getting all the houses in the game! Im so excited about her houses. Oh, and I just realized a lot of the CC can be found if you browse through the sims magazines. 😉

  5. Great chapter! Noelle is lovely, and DMHWH made me laugh! I’ve noticed that my family-oriented Sims are much more interested in their grandchildren than their own kids. *sigh*

    Also congrats on your new kitty! He is a very handsome dude!

    • Thank you! What is it with that trait? I’ve noticed the same thing across other sims, too. Really odd.

      He is the best kitty evarrrr. He looks like he is always winking. :’D ❤

  6. That’s a Labyrinth poster! Behind them when Connor’s feeling the baby! It’s even in English! Ooft, Bowie…

    I love your Legacy. 😀

  7. Oh my gosh Woody <333 your one eye makes you precious.
    I'm getting a kitty too! Yay for cats!
    I can't go to shelters and pounds and stuff like that it makes me feel guilty and want all of them :c
    House gets gorgeous-er (not a word, DMHWH) in this chapter!

  8. Woody is freakin’ adorable!!!! I would totally pick him if I ever went to a shelter. I chose my budgie because she was all downtrodden and had her feathers ripped out by vicious bullies, and she turned out to be the sweetest, quirkiest little bird ever. It’s always the scarred ones that have character, so joke’s on all those people who passed up your pirate cat! 😉

    Oh, and I’m finally getting caught up on this legacy! So incredibly awesome. Your narration is perfect and I love your Sims! I lol’d at the toad because I’d never seen it before, but now I fear I will have nightmares. Somebody at EA must have had a ball designing that thing…

    • He is the best cat ever! We’ve had him for around 3 months now and I can’t remember what life was like without him. He wakes me up with little nose kisses every morning. ❤ He's so gentle, too. Never bites or scratches. I agree with you that the scarred ones have more character, and I'm glad your budgie found a home with you. ❤

      Thank you so much! Oh man, that toad is fucking nasty but I love it. Ugggh, I swear it's like I can feel the texture just by looking at it. Moist.

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